And so..

It begins.....

Walked to kinkos today to load up on paper ideas for the new poetry book. For the longest time I have been trying to workshop whether to make them myself or get them printed out there somewhere. So, now I have been playing with it for a while and getting excited by it, I have decided to make them myself....you know, gotta keep that indie thing going (of course, by that I mean independent....lol....that could have so many meanings).

So here I sit, playing with colors and fonts and paper and throwing around graphic ideas. I am hoping the first run of these will be ready for my shows next week. People are always surprised to hear me say I am scared or nervous of creative ventures....but I am, both of those things. I keep pushing into it coz I know its the right thing for me to do. Even if its just for me.....and my mum. Although, some of these poems have too many 'fuck you's' in it for my mum, perhaps.

Oh speaking of which, did I tell you that my mums boyfriend asked her to marry him? Kinda cool no? 77 and still being open to love.

I will have great news to share with you soon in that general direction. You know, the being open to, direction.

Back to the fonts

Xxm

The epitome

Of evil....

Jamming

With the boys out here in west Hollywood. These boys know more indigo girls songs than I even know or have heard. Might need to give my card back.....

Farmers market..

Burbank farmers market....

All organic, all fresh and beautiful looking. The sun is shining and I wish all my mates could be here to sample everything with us.

Xxm

Grateful....

For my life, for this day, for love, for mates, for the sun, for good food, good wine and good company. Just grateful.

Kicking back

In the SoCal kinda way...

I have three weeks with no shows, what's a girl to do? Hmmm....so many options, but for right now, I am chilling catching up on world events. You know, seriously important ones. Sure there is a song in there somewhere....

Xxm

Melineh K

And me. Hanging, practising Australian, shooting the shit LA style....us style.

Check out her tunes, google melineh k.

Xxm

Hotel cafe

Sweet little venue Hollywood with the musical stylungs of Simon Lynch and me and Melineh K listening.

Xxm

And there she sits...

Mary, gently doing her thing.

I found her in the laundromat, minding her own business between wash and spin. While the Armenian washing lady looked over my shoulder dressed in her sparkly shirt as though she was going to break out in a disco move any second. Brand spanking new, soft brown towels swirling around in the machine....the beginnng.

As I smile imagining them against my body, she smiles knowingly to herself, as though she and Mary have a secret and it suddenly becomes clear.....to all of us.

We are all connected.....even by a thin thread of knowing.

Xxm

Heroes.....

A good mate of mine works on the set of a show called Heroes and I am waiting for a call from him to take D and I onto the set for the afternoon...which I am totally excited about. I don't watch a lot of tv these days, but that is one show I would make an exception for (although, truth be told, I missed the premier of it last night and instead watched it online this morning).

Anyway, my morning started with watching last nights premier and one part of the show actually gave me the chills....it was when one of the main characters has an epiphany because of a near death experience, he says;

"we're all connected. Our hopes, our dreams, our childrens future...reflecting back in each others eyes. We fight our own personal battles but we know we're not alone because only together, can we make our short time on this planet mean something. Only together can we be the stewards of our own destiny."

It's idea I think of all the time...every time I go for a bike ride (or walk) I try to make eye contact with everyone I see on the path, because I want to be connected to these people. I LOVE bringing people together to do things together. I know how much the success of what I do is connected to the people who connect with what I do, and turn up to my shows and buy my cds and continue to support what I do. And I am constantly day dreaming about how cool it would be to connect people I know with other people I know who I think would get on SO well together and probably end up as best friends.

I also think about it when I think of the people I have chosen to be disconnected from...I can count those people on one hand but I make a conscious choice because of the way they chose to be in the world and how that effects and has or will, hurt me and others (continually). I fight with what I know is healthy and honorable to myself and the uncomfortable feeling of disconnect. Knowing that every time I choose the former, I am be true and safe and kind and loving to myself and to those I love.

I believe we are all part of the web of life that connects all living beings, its only when we understand that fully that we will become more cognizant of how each one of our relationships and interactions affects another person.

Anyway, in the idea of 6 degrees of separation, we are all connected...and we are all looking for connection. We crave it, we ache for it, we don't always understand that is the missing thing in us sometimes...but connection, is life.

Of course, these are just the thoughts of a little Aussie sometimes folk singer...

who can't wait for next weeks episode of Heroes.....(and who will no doubt put photos of said visit to set, up here!!)

xxM

Just Because...

It makes me happy to look at....(and yes...I couldnt decide which one i wanted up, so i put both!!)

Out on the pier at Catalina Island.....perfect weather, perfect company, perfect time.

xxM

Catalina dreaming.....

This must be a dream.....100x better, that's what the psychic said earlier this year. Damn, she is a good psychic....need to send her a thank you card.

Xxm

And

The view from our hotel. This kinda makes me think of rottnest, for those of you in perth.

Catalina

Island is where we be!! Love surprises!! Especially ones I actually don't guess!!

This is a view of the edge of the island and the casino, which isn't anymore.

Xxm

And so.....

The adventure begins......

Its a day of surprises and we are on the 710 freeway on the way to somewhere. Eating red vines and Pink is playing loud in the background. Its sunny and a perfect Sunday that started with bike rides and coffee (of course, I would HAVE to combine those two things).

This is D, the maestro of the surprises, grinning big coz she knows I have no clue what the day holds. I asked her to give me a face, and this be it.

Off to the first surprise...

Xxm

Couldn't have said it

Better myself.....

The State of Things to Come...

So....I can't vote here in the US. It's very frustrating considering I pay taxes here, follow the laws, am legal and pay for that right dearly every few years and everything that happens here effects me too. I am so passionate about the idea of voting that I even petitioned the Australian government to put me back on the electoral role there so that I could at least continue to have a say in the country of my birth.

So...here I try to do 'my bit'.....if you haven't registered to vote...please...take responsibility and do so....go here:

http://www.rockthevote.com

If you are registered...please read up on who you are going to vote for and know why.

This is a really important right that you have been given...please don't fuck it up. (lol).

And for those who are interested...there are a lot of 'open' letters being sent out about Sarah Palin and the damage that she has and could do. Here is a very powerful one from the wonderful Eve Ensler.

So...go...register, read, choose to be a part of change you wish to see....

xxM

Eve Ensler, the American playwright, performer, feminist and activist best known for "The Vagina Monologues", wrote the following about Sarah Palin.

Drill, Drill, Drill

I am having Sarah Palin nightmares. I dreamt last night that she was a member of a club where they rode snowmobiles and wore the claws of drowned and starved polar bears around their necks. I have a particular thing for Polar Bears. Maybe it's their snowy whiteness or their bigness or the fact that they live in the arctic or that I have never seen one in person or touched one. Maybe it is the fact that they live so comfortably on ice. Whatever it is, I need the polar bears.

I don't like raging at women. I am a Feminist and have spent my life trying to build community, help empower women and stop violence against them. It is hard to write about Sarah Palin. This is why the Sarah Palin choice was all the more insidious and cynical. The people who made this choice count on the goodness and solidarity of Feminists.

But everything Sarah Palin believes in and practices is antithetical to Feminism which for me is part of one story -- connected to saving the earth, ending racism, empowering women, giving young girls options, opening our minds, deepening tolerance, and ending violence and war.

I believe that the McCain/Palin ticket is one of the most dangerous choices of my lifetime, and should this country chose those candidates the fall-out may be so great, the destruction so vast in so many areas that America may never recover. But what is equally disturbing is the impact that duo would have on the rest of the world. Unfortunately, this is not a joke. In my lifetime I have seen the clownish, the inept, the bizarre be elected to the presidency with regularity.

Sarah Palin does not believe in evolution. I take this as a metaphor. In her world and the world of Fundamentalists nothing changes or gets better or evolves. She does not believe in global warming. The melting of the arctic, the storms that are destroying our cities, the pollution and rise of cancers, are all part of God's plan. She is fighting to take the polar bears off the endangered species list. The earth, in Palin's view, is here to be taken and plundered. The wolves and the bears are here to be shot and plundered. The oil is here to be taken and plundered. Iraq is here to be taken and plundered. As she said herself of the Iraqi war, "It was a task from God."

Sarah Palin does not believe in abortion. She does not believe women who are raped and incested and ripped open against their will should have a right to determine whether they have their rapist's baby or not.

She obviously does not believe in sex education or birth control. I imagine her daughter was practicing abstinence and we know how many babies that makes.

Sarah Palin does not much believe in thinking. From what I gather she has tried to ban books from the library, has a tendency to dispense with people who think independently. She cannot tolerate an environment of ambiguity and difference. This is a woman who could and might very well be the next president of the United States. She would govern one of the most diverse populations on the earth.

Sarah believes in guns. She has her own custom Austrian hunting rifle. She has been known to kill 40 caribou at a clip. She has shot hundreds of wolves from the air.

Sarah believes in God. That is of course her right, her private right. But when God and Guns come together in the public sector, when war is declared in God's name, when the rights of women are denied in his name, that is the end of separation of church and state and the undoing of everything America has ever tried to be.

I write to my sisters. I write because I believe we hold this election in our hands. This vote is a vote that will determine the future not just of the U.S., but of the planet. It will determine whether we create policies to save the earth or make it forever uninhabitable for humans. It will determine whether we move towards dialogue and diplomacy in the world or whether we escalate violence through invasion, undermining and attack. It will determine whether we go for oil, strip mining, coal burning or invest our money in alternatives that will free us from dependency and destruction. It will determine if money gets spent on education and healthcare or whether we build more and more methods of killing. It will determine whether America is a free open tolerant society or a closed place of fear, fundamentalism and aggression.

If the Polar Bears don't move you to go and do everything in your power to get Obama elected then consider the chant that filled the hall after Palin spoke at the RNC, "Drill Drill Drill." I think of teeth when I think of drills. I think of rape. I think of destruction. I think of domination. I think of military exercises that force mindless repetition, emptying the brain of analysis, doubt, ambiguity or dissent. I think of pain.

Do we want a future of drilling? More holes in the ozone, in the floor of the sea, more holes in our thinking, in the trust between nations and peoples, more holes in the fabric of this precious thing we call life?

Eve Ensler
September 5, 2008

Angry anymore?

I remember when Ani Difranco released her song called 'Angry Anymore'...and people seemed a little crabby about it. People liked her angry...liked her angry material....seems they liked it much more than her not so angry songs.

Someone recently asked me if now that I am happier and in love with an amazing woman, if I am still going to be angry and write angry songs and poetry.

I was a little perplexed by that question at first and wanted to say...'jeeze, give me a break, I've only just started'. ..infact, I think that is what I did say. I was perplexed because it yet again reminded me how uncomfortable people are with anger......although we are also strangely drawn and relieved to hear other peoples angry songs. I know the new batch of songs I have written this year have had a HUGE response from people all over. They identify with them, even in the midst of uncomfortable.I think again, that it's that thing of making us realize we are not weird, or alone in our feelings.

I have said it before, but I see experiences, especially ones that are life altering and painful, as scars that we carry forever. They alter who we once were in the same way a physical scar changes the landscape of our bodies. Possibly the goal is to find a way to heal them up enough so that we don't react from the middle of that scar every time its touched....or looked at in the wrong way....or not touched or looked at, at all!!!. Like any scar we will probably always remember the events around us getting it in the first place....especially if it's a big one...it serves as a reminder. I know a few physical scars on my body still cause me to shudder when I remember how I got them.

Anyway, the answer to the question for me is, no that doesn't mean that those feelings are instantly gone and, yes I am still writing about it. Infact, sometimes those feelings can still be triggered by some piece of information or opinion that is passed or shared with me (which tells me healing is still occurring). I still have some songs and poems to write and that are in the process of being written that capture and chronicle that part of my life experience. Hell, all my life experiences. Its almost like they are sitting in me waiting their turn to come out and I just haven't been able to keep up with them. Even yesterday I started a song that begins with the line:

'the truth according to you, is full of lies'.

The scar left on me by that experience is now part of the landscape of me. I can be at peace with that in the same way I am about the other scars I have, in so far as using it as a reminder for the things I had to learn, the person I needed to become.....oh, and never letting that person anywhere near me again (ahh but be careful of saying 'never' in the universes ear, right?).

I don't think of myself as an angry person one bit, but I will continue to write...as it falls out of me, hopefully unfiltered....about things that can make me feel angry....and happy.....and lovey...and confused...and silly....and....well, you get the idea.

Xxm

Ps. Of course, this blog post is unfiltered too and I am thinking outloud so I may change my mind as I think about it all more.....but I doubt it.

My night

Was spent like this. Scared to move incase I woke jacque up. Although he kept wanting to sleep nose to nose, which was a little much for me....but cheek to cheek, I can do.

Xxm

So...

As with any road block, you can either camp out and wait for it to move, turn around or find another way through.

In good Capricorn style, I tried to find another way through, until every 'through' looked like this....so now I turn around to go make coffee at home!!

Xxm