I read on someones blog over the weekend that it seems the only posts that ever get put up on blogs are ones that talk about how wonderful and amazing life is and never the 'life is messy, isn't so wonderful and amazing' posts. Longtime readers of this blog will know that isn't true for me. I tend to put the whole lot out there and have had some really big 'life is fucked' blog posts.
I do actually believe that my life is wonderful and amazing and most days I am awed by the amazingness of it...
Not so much today.
I barely slept last night. No real reason except possibly that second cup of LARGE coffee earlier in the day...and no exercise perhaps. But you know, when I lay awake my brain gets bored and starts to stress about things....some of which I was actually stressed about before but had under control, and others that I really wasn't stressed about...until then.
So I got up and made myself busy around the house until around 4am when I thought I could possibly sleep and stop freaking myself out about things that weren't really that bad....but not so much. Which of course, makes my day so much more fun today.
Infact, I am sure that it is that lack of sleep that caused me to just declared outloud that I don't like being an adult today.
I don't like trying to find health insurance here in the US that will cover my wife and I and wont cost me a fucking shit load of money for NOTHING. Who knew that health insurance would be so much more expensive living in Indiana than it was California. Well, perhaps not 'so much' more....but still...more!! And hell, I barely get anything for my health insurance now and I pay around $150 a month for it. It's for those 'just in case' moments. I am severely frustrated that most of the plans I looked at don't cover the absolute necessities for women here.
You know, like a visit to the whohaa doctor.
SO important and I am unwilling to pay hundreds of dollars a month for insurance that LEAVES THAT OUT.
We LLC'ed last week and I had grand thoughts that trumpets or something would blare on high once we did it. That somehow we (MuseKraft LLC) would be easier to manage and would open up the way for us to have access to 'secret' special company stuff.
Yeah...so secret and special.
The $950 a month Aetna tried to slog us for health insurance (for two of us) was anything but special.
Just incase you were wondering.....I am yelling towards DC hoping that Obama and the dumb republican cronies that are being fuckheads, will hear something from out here in the world and actually get something done for healthcare in this country. Because this is stupid.
So...anyway, there you have it.
My crabby post. I'm in a 'sleep deprived, overwhelmed, pissed off, over the rain' funk and am trying to work out what to do for myself to pull out of it. (Yes, thank you for the suggestions because that's what we all really love....haha, that bit sounds crabby but I am actually giggling as I write it).
If you were to see me right now, I would look very similar to this kiddo here. Walking around the house stamping my feet, my lip hanging out. My year one teacher use to make us sing a song when we were like this; 'nobody loves me, everybody hates me, think I'll go eat worms. Long ones, short ones, fat ones, thin ones. See how they wiggle and squirm.'
The difference between me and this kid though (and that kid from grade one).....is that I can drink.
(haha...but it's a little too early, even for me)
xxM
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