I cried when I first read this quote.....those straight from your heart and out your eyes kind of tears.
2008 has been such a big year in the life and heart of this little Aussie and I believe I have been grappling with the lesson this quote is trying to share with us. I think 2008 broke me in ways I haven't been broken before..deep, personal, life altering kinda ways...but it also rebuilt me in ways I have wished for in the past and wondered how to achieve. (footnote to self...be careful what you wish for).
My year in a nutshell went something like this:
- moved into a new place in Emeryville, CA
- finished recording my new cd
- missed my family like crazy
- went to Australia for a month to visit family and do shows
- lost my luggage for 6 days whilst there
- came back to the US and left my home and community of 8 years and moved to Chicago
- got involved with a pathological liar who somehow got under my radar and stomped my heart hard (although not so much under the radar of mates that met her along the way)
- learned I probably need to listen to my mates a little more
- understood for a moment the concept of hating
- and then understood how destructive to self that hate can be
- learned about boundaries and when to put them up and hold them up real tight
- I learned how to bounce someones emails
- started to listen to my own intuition more
- built a new website
- released my new amazing cd
- experienced living in some version of snow for the first time ever
- built my first snow kangaroo
- experienced anxiety attacks for the first time
- stopped eating because of aforementioned anxiety attacks
- took anti anxiety medication (all 20 of them) (not at once of course) for the first time and felt better
- stopped having anxiety attacks and stopped taking it
- played some great shows...festivals and house concerts
- played with some great people
- got fit
- hung out with great mates
- created a garden
- toured through some new towns
- got to know some old friends again
- made a new community and was enveloped in the beautiful arms of my existing one
- felt truly blessed by the people that found me
- found my love of cycling again
- wrote a shit load of poems
- released my first poetry chapbook
- played shows with more passion, energy, vulnerability and truth than ever before
- wrote some great new tunes
- met new, wonderful people
- watched audience turn out increase around the country
- learnt me better
- had my heart and soul swept away by an amazing, beautiful, honest woman
- fell madly in love with her
- stood by my love as she tragically lost her beautiful little brother
- had my heart broken as I mourned the loss of a man I didn't know and now will never know
- fell in love some more
- moved back to California to be with her
- said 'yes' but 'ask me again' in a few months
- made new friends in LA and re-established relationships with old, very dear, ones
- started recording a new cd
- got creative in a whole pile of new and interesting ways
- learned about trusting again
- got to spend another year doing what I love, being connected with the people I love, by the songs and stories that I love
In all honesty, there are a few things I would change about this year if I could..but I also know that all those things combined have brought me to where I am and made me who I am this year...so...if I truly believe things happen for a reason then, even if I don't fully understand it all, I have to also believe that everything had to happen in its time to bring me here.
And for that...and for your support, friendship, belief and love....
I am thankful.
Wishing you love, honesty, peace, creativity and another year of journey and this thing we call life.
xxM
6 comments:
What a great collection of photo's and memories. It was so much fun. Your presence in the Midwest had me feeling like i should have wrote a paper on how i spent my summer vacation. ...Great Adventures with One Little Aussie. I am very grateful for your friendship. I know i must get out of my own way and live by that quote that moves me to tears as well. Thanks. XoKC
PS. Happy to read that you said "Yes"!
Thanks for sharing so much of your life over the past year through your blog. I love that you fearlessly share your thoughts and feelings with the world - the good, the angry, the contemplative, and the deep passion that is ML. Have an enjoyable 2009 full of love and success and keep up the great work with your blog. Love your view of the world - your photos are priceless!
That's a beautiful post and I love the photo collage. You never cease to amaze and inspire me. I also am glad you said yes. Say it again when I ask...
mm yes, i like the sound of that. do share. fabulous post by the way.
wow..a great quote and a great way to share your thoughts of an incredible year..so thankYOU martine..for sharing ur heart, and preparedness to live ur dreams and live as authentically as u can...I have received much inspiration, enlightenment and joy from following ur journey...and thankyou to all the other bloggy folk who have shared here too..peace..
holy hell, that's a lot! wow.
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